She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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