based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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