This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Randomize