Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
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