Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
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