The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
It's shark week go big or go home
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
