what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
