forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Randomize
