In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
I'm at about main and main street
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
