her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Randomize