YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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