I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Randomize
