yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
