i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
Randomize
