i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize