At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
NoShamevember. You game?
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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