Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Randomize
