I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?