Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
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