nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Randomize
