My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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