i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Randomize
