So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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