I accidentally burped into my bong.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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