my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
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