Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
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