i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
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