A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Randomize