you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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