Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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