My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Randomize
