Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
