it wasn't lemon gatorade
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Randomize