Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
