She went from zero to smokin in five shots
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
