I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
