What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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