hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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