Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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