I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
