On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
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