Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
