community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Randomize
