Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... π―πππ
Do I even want to know?
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
IβM PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize