is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Randomize
