you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize
