One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Randomize