babies were throwing up all over the place
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
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