i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Randomize
