I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Verdict: uncircumcised.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize