I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
BRING THE BAGELS
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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