wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
